Wednesday, May 02, 2012

#82. or, what's romantic (one question Wednesday)

  I was working on something for yesterday but it just looked so bad to me and i couldn't make it seem right that i got discouraged and walked away from it. Last night, i had my wife give it a look and she didn't think it was so bad so you may see it later in the week. It still needs some work though and it's definately not a masterpiece. Sometimes i need her help on these things.
 
 One thing i did do was leave a question over at Josie 2 Shoes site for One Question Wednesday and in return, she supplied me with this one.

  You are planning some down time with your wife in the near future, if expense was not an issue, what would be her idea of the most romantic getaway possible, what would be yours, and which one would you go with?

 Immediately on reading this question, my brain said to me, staying in one of those hut on stilt things in Bora Bora would be the most romantic thing ever!


hot weather + less clothes = more romantic
  I asked my wife what she thought was her idea of a romantic holiday. She immediatley said, "i have something but it's not what you're going to like." I asked her what she was thinking, and she said that romantic isn't necessarily a place as it is so much a state of mind. Romantic could be in a cabin in the mountains by ourselves with a cozy fire and a warm blanket to cuddle under. Romantic could be alone together at the beach on a remote tropicial island with the waves crashing on the shore. Romantic might even be sitting alone together on our deck on a quiet night with the stars shinning above our heads.

  That got me thinking way back to when we were a week or so from getting married. We were going for a walk in the evening, just as it was getting dark. Suddenly out of nowhere, the woods beside us was filled with fire flies. I had lived here all my life and that was the first time i had ever seen them. It was a romantic moment.

  She's right of course, romantic isn't a place or holiday destination. We try to make them that and it's always nice if you can do it. In Mexico last winter, laying in bed together in the morning listening to the waves rolling onto the beach was pretty darned romantic but without her there it would have just been a nice place.

  ..............she's smart that way, that's why i love her.........but i'm still pulling for Bora Bora.  :)

25 comments:

  1. I like your wife :)

    Fiji sounds nice too of course. But romance can be just the darndest things at the darndest times :)

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    1. i like her too. :)
      Maybe i tend to get too caught up in trying to fabricate romance from a destination when the romance is always there, we just need to let it spill all over the place. :)

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  2. A wonderful post that left me smiling. You two know the secret... it's not about where you are, it's about who your with that makes the magic happen! We find our hot tub underneath the moon and stars pretty romantic too! I love the idea of a cabin in the mountains or a cottage at the beach, far enough away from daily concerns to ignore them altogether and just enjoy each other's company. Making time for each other, that's the important thing in a relationship, you sound very content, and that's always nice to read!

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    1. In all of her examples, it was always just her amd i. Sometimes, the trick can be in finding her and i time in the hustle and bustle of every day stuff. At times, just catching her eye and sharing a smile in a crowded room can be romantic too if everything else disappears for that second or two?

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  3. Great thoughts from both of you! I completely agree with your wife - a situation can be romantic no matter where you are, but I believe it takes some effort on one or the other or both people's part to make it happen. I find that my back deck facing the woods and the sound of the creek, with my white lights strung all around it is a perfect location for a romantic evening, but only if both of us are out there together, fully enjoying the moment! Ha ha.

    I'll root for you and your Bora Bora idea. I LOVE travel, and have always wanted to go to a place like that. I am a firm believer that couples HAVE to try and plan a get-away at least once a year. Being together for a long time, while familiarity is warm and comforting and good, can also allow for complacency to settle in and things can get a little stale. New places and experiences together spark that excitement and offers novelty that (for me) is crucial in a relationship, and for me, in life.

    Love your post! I'm back from the Windy City and exhausted but will try to post a little about my trip soon.

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    1. I hope your trip was awesome.
      I think you have a point about mixing things up. Sometimes it can be hard to make the stresses of what's going on around you disappear when you are living in it everyday. We haven't gone on many trips but i know the feeling that i get as the plane lifts off, that whatever is happening at home is just going to have to wait until i get back.

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    2. It was amazing! I have to take a short break (explained in one post I just put up) for work tasks but should only be about 3-4 days and THEN I can't wait to have an abundance of time to dangle in the hammock.

      I'm all about mixing it up. It is embedded in my personality type. And you are so right - it is hard when day-to-day is so.....routine. That is why I am an advocate for trips. It doesn't matter to me if a couple has little children. Most people can find a good friend or family that are usually more than glad to keep them. It's healthy for the kids to have that break too! I know finances are a factor, but I have always looked at is as an investment. We've had get-aways and the more elaborate (all-inclusive in Mexico? I am a different woman, for sure! ;) so it takes some planning and intention but it can happen.

      Ah, the plane lift off...my favorite, especially at night.

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    3. Correction:
      *We've had MORE MEAGER get-aways and the more elaborate.

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    4. We"ve been trying to go every second year during the winter. They last pretty long here and come January, when the days are short and gloomy, getting away to some sunshine for a week can be so just what a person needs.

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  4. Well said, Ken!
    Sometimes thes OQW's are kind of heady. I like that you kept it real. After all, the answer so often depends on your interpretation of the question.

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    1. I actually did question her answer whether it was in the spirit of the question. We talked about it a bit and in the end, she did have a destination. Her origional thought was the better one and that's why it's here.

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  5. Aww love this Ken! I think exactly the same way as your wife. It's not about location at all... although, I do want to visit a white sand/clear water beach - so Bora Bora does sound good!

    This was a great post to read right after Red's - if you haven't read her's yet, you must absolutely RUN over there and see what she has to say!

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    1. We've been to 2 different white sand beach destinations. They are far and away my favorite. Bora Bora is that dream one that may have to wait for retirement or when we win the lottery?

      I spotted Red's post last night as i was shutting down. On my way there now. :)

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  6. Romance isn't a location... being that if you don't bring it there, you're not going to find it there! But you already know that so...

    Man Bora Bora sure looks like an awesome place to be. I've never had the privilege to travel. I went to Florida a few years ago but that's about it! I'm stuck here in Indiana, surrounded by corn fields.

    I decided to play along with OQW this week. My questions/answers are on Josie's blog, her answers post.... just in case you were curious.

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    1. I was over there checking out her answers just a bit ago. I seem to be getting behind on my commenting though.

      Bora Bora is a place we put on our list after we watched the movie Coulpes Retreat. The movie was shot there and it is really beautiful. The scenery was much better than the movie.

      We wern't able to do much traveling other than local stuff until our kids got older. We got to take them all on a trip and that was really fun but sometimes some mom and dad getaways are just what a person needs.

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  7. Sounds like you've got one smart cookie by your side. :)

    -Barb the French Bean

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    1. Thanks, i think i'll keep her. ;)

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  8. I don't know how long you have been married, but it sounds like you already know that it must be created. You and your wife understand this, so probably have a leg up on many people who run around trying to find it. Concentration on each other and a little effort goes a long way. Without ever leaving the house.

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    1. We've been together for 20 years. Married for 18. I'm not going to lie to you and say it was all heavenly bliss but that's going to happen. Especially early on. We're now in a place though that feels just right. I couldn't imagine not having her with me.

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  9. I agree with both of you! You are both right cause Bora Bora rocks!

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    1. now i'm a little bit jealous of you. Especially if you've been to Bora Bora AND own a trailer park! :)

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  10. Posted a reply to your comment on my instrumentals post, but to save you from running from place to place (this gets a little crazy trying to keep up with people that ACTUALLY reply to posts and comments...) I am going to paste what I put there HERE so you can see that I gave extensive thought to your comment...:)

    I hear you! Lately I find myself with me, myself and I A LOT more than I ever have been in my entire existence, including the hours I must've spent ruminating in my crib...and I get sick of me too...Music fills in the gaps, doesn't it? The times are rare for me that music ISN'T present - right now, the house is empty, t.v. is OFF (I abhor t.v.) and Pandora is my companion. Ever checked into Pandora? I guess I am doing a pro bono plug, but that internet radio feature is awesome. It plays channels of favorite artists, and opens a world of new music that I might not otherwise come across. I am a collector of songs - I have a 'note' on my phone listing songs I come across that I love, or ones that I want to post here, or ones that evoke such memory that they warrant sharing with the memory attached. I found out, after my aunt passed away tragically, that she also kept a running list of songs/artists that she loved. She and I were so alike.

    As for the cello, I didn't know I adored it until a few years ago and I had taken a trip with the hubs out to California. I was standing in the middle of the Promenade in Santa Monica falling HEAD OVER HEELS with the deep, slow, sultry sound of the street performers, Ken Oak Band and their incredible cello skills. I stood there enamored. I bought all of their cds right then and have followed them since. They are now Oak and Gorski. You can probably find them on you tube. Their songs (and lyrics) reach me... The guys that played 'With or Without You' are called 2 Cellos and you can also discover them on you tube. (Thank You, Lord, for You Tube!!). Great stuff.

    I am completely giving you a break BUT I am a STICKLER for holding people to their dreams......it is NEVER too late to become a brooding, awesome cello player - find out where you can get lessons and DO IT!!!!

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    1. we have a pretty extensive itunes library that we listen to but i haven't checked out pandora. I may just do that.

      I guess i'll see how i do with the brooding and if that turns out well, maybe i'll dabble into the cello field. :)

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  11. Or there is the romance of riding the rails or being a pirate.

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    1. Except both of those often require you to have less teeth for some reason? Maybe they have poor dental plans? :)

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