Sunday, September 09, 2012

#113. or, ......and then we did a lot of driving for nothing

  Last week I traded my old combine in on a new one. It's not the new, new one. The one with new combine smell and plastic still on the seat. As much as I would dearly love to slide my pale farmer ass behind the wheel of that little beauty, it costs a third of a million dollars and that's somewhat out of my price range.  The one I can afford is the new, used one. It's somewhere around half the cost of the new, new one so I have to buy the new combine smell air freshener to mask the smell of old grain dust and be happy about financing another piece of equipment.

  Except, it's Sunday morning and I have yet to actually SEE my fricken new, used combine!

  During the summer, I made a mention to my salesman that I was interested in purchasing a new header for my old combine. That's the attachment on the front of my combine that allows me to cut the standing grain and combine it all in one process. The one I have is undersized and was not utilizing the combine that I have to it's fullest potential. The reason I approached my salesman in the summer to try to find me this, is because the closer we get to harvest, the less chance there is of anything being available. I wanted to avoid that. So, last week, and still no header, I talked to my salesman again and the header he's got for me is a complete PIECE. OF. SHIT!

  So, because I'm an easy sell, and like shiny new things, he convinces me what I really need is a brand new, used combine. Thursday morning, he called me to say the exact new, used combine, that would be perfect for me just became available. Like overnight! Now my dealership isn't JUST my dealership. It covers a good deal of the center of the province that I live in. There's a bunch of stores in towns and cities scattered about, so wherever you live, a tractor store isn't too far away. Each store generally has a couple salesmen. So it's not quite like going in to buy a new, used car off the lot. Any salesman can sell any piece of equipment from any of those dealerships at any time. Essentially, you could be sitting in the cab of a combine, trying to make the decision on whether or not to take on more debt load on this particular unit, while 200 miles away, 13 other  farmers are potentially signing the papers and buying it out from under you, without your knowledge, while you waffle. It SUCKS! I can't tell you how much I hate trying to make a deal this way.

  Anyways, Thursday morning, my salesman says we should go immediately to look at this combine before it gets sold. It's 2 hours away, so off we go. Along the way, we're still trying to find a new header, because now, with a bigger combine, my old one is REALLY undersized so I still need the header. The header which I originally wanted to buy, but got up-sold into a new combine instead. As we're passing a dealership along the way, he's talking on the speaker phone to another salesman about any headers available there, and my salesman mentions that we're headed to look at this combine. The guy on the other end of the line says it's not there! Apparently it's on a truck someplace headed to one of the two dealerships within easy driving distance of my home. It will be there by morning. So we turn around and go home.

  In the mean time, I pretty much have to commit to this unit, that I haven't seen yet, because "it's harvest season" and these units disappear rather quickly.

  Friday morning, my salesman calls and says I should meet him at this other dealership, near my home to look over the combine. I drive there, no combine. Well, that's not exactly true,the one that came overnight was the wrong one but a different salesman  has already sold this wrong combine. They make some phone calls, and it's determined that MY combine is on a different truck, somewhere on route to my dealership. It will be there Saturday morning. Again I drive home without seeing this combine I've bought.

  Saturday morning, I purposely waited a while to be sure they had time for my combine to arrive and get unloaded. I drive to town, NO FRICKEN COMBINE!!!

   It seems, someone has lost what is almost without question the largest piece of farm equipment that you can buy. How the hell does that happen? They tell me it should show up on Monday. This is turning into a complete nightmare. Without, of course the REE REE REE, shower curtain scene.

   ................if it doesn't show up on Monday, I'm going to look at red combines!


   I am submitting this post to Dude write this week. It's where guy bloggers come together to submit posts, that get voted on from Sunday to Tuesday evening to see whose was most popular. I encourage you to pop over and take a look at them and maybe come back and vote on three of your favorites. 
You can get there by clicking on THIS LINK.

43 comments:

  1. Are you kidding? How can these people function as business men? I'm so sorry you had to go through all that run around and you're still waiting....grrrr!!! Want me to call them up and go nutso on them Monday? I have nothing better to do anyway...my voice is all NY nasal and annoying..it'd be my pleasure LOL

    Seriously, though - I hope it shows up, Ken.

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    1. It's a little bit discouraging that this is happening.

      I guess we'll see what happens Monday before we rain down your wrath on them.

      It's funny, I've never read your posts and comments as you with a nasaly, New York accent. I'll correct that. :)

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    2. LOL - If you are familiar with King of Queens and Carrie; I've been told I look and sound a lot like her...

      fingers crossed today goes well for you!

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    3. Now I can put a face to the accent as well.

      And you're pretty fortunate, she's quite an attractive woman. :)

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  2. Hey Ken, I never mentioned that I also have a NY accent. I'd be happy to whack them too.

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    1. Thanks Joe, there's always strength in numbers.

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  3. Ummm...I have a brand-spanking-new mower for my postage stamp backyard. Be happy to lend it to you, if that helps.
    As someone who cannot relate to your livelihood in the slightest, I really enjoyed this tidbit.

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    1. I may just have to take you up on that mower offer yet.

      I try to put a bit of effort into trying to explain what I do in my life in a manner to be clear, yet not to drawn out and boring. I know that sometimes it doesn't work but I hope that once in a while, I succeed.

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  4. Wow, I had no idea you were going through so much hassle with this. Those dealers need to get their act together and find your new, old combine, before it becomes an old, old combine. Maybe it ran away with a tractor to elope?

    But red? Really?? Don't you mean pink?!

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    1. Everyone at the dealership is blaming the trucking company. If I had gone down to where it is, I could driven the thing all the way home by now. And they only do 25 mph!

      Red is closer to pink than green? :)

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  5. It really sounds like you weren't treated very well by this salesman. Too bad because you might have done more business with him in the future but now I'm guessing you won't.

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    1. The thing is, each salesman is designated an area to work out of. That's your salesman, you can't really pick from the litter.

      To be fair though, I think that the issue goes beyond what he's capable of dealing with in this instance.

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  6. How on earth did they lose it,those things are enormous! Did they check behind the couch cushions? That's where I find everything I've lost.

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    1. That's what I'd like to know!

      Nothing in the couch cushions. And I also checked the lint trap in the dryer. Still nothing! :)

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  7. I blame David Copperfield. He was driving through your area and thought "Know what would be fun? Making a combine disappear!!"

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    1. That damned Copperfield!! I could send my lawyer after him but he'd probably just make him disappear as well?

      ......or is it even possible to make a lawyer disappear?

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  8. My jaw is tightening from your stress. What a pain in the ass.

    Maybe you might have to do it all with scissors at this rate

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    1. What a pain in the ass! That's exactly what it all boils down to in the end.

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  9. I hope you didn't actually pay any money for this combine yet. Also, that is quite the handsome ghost chicken you have in your sidebar. :)

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    1. No money as of yet, so I'm safe in that aspect.

      It is a handsome ghost chicken isn't it? It probably might not even be there if it wasn't the BEST ghost chicken in the whole damned world!! :)

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  10. Obviously, I didn't wave hard enough when I drove through Alberta - I'll set my Grandma's ghost on those guys.

    Also, I have a spare stapler in case you're thinking of bending anyone over...

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    1. I have a bit of a feeling that both of those items would be more intimidating with you there to wield them. :)

      I tend to not be very threatening, I think?

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    2. Some things can be learned. I'd probably run from an angry farmer wielding a stapler, if only because I assumed you'd inhaled too much pesticide.

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  11. Throw your toys out of the cot >>>>> Preferably aimed at someone's head :)

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    1. I'm getting to the point where I'm willing to try anything. Throwing something at someone's head might be in order?

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  12. Hey Ken, I can fake a good New York accent, I also own a lawn mower and a stapler. I have a particular loathing of car salesman, so tackling something larger would be fun.

    Think of it this way, he owes you a combine and that brand new one should be just fine.

    WG

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    1. Sure, you're welcome to come along. I've always wanted to be part of a pitch-fork mob!

      One day I'll get into what is actually involved with getting a new, new combine. You have to wait a year while they build the damned thing.

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  13. Goodness!...this is about as angry as I've ever seen you write...and even this is a chilled-out-ocean-of-calm-nothing-phases-me kind of rage...

    And as everybody else is offering the use of their accents to aid you with your combine issues, I feel that I should offer you the use of my stiff-upper-lip English accent... as we English are often portrayed as evil masterminds by Hollywood film makers this may send a shiver down the spine of any pain-in-the-arse salesmen and encourage them to provide a better service to you...

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    1. Hi Jamie. Maybe that's my super power. Unflappable blandness? Wonder if a cape comes with that uniform?

      If I can get the Aussies on board, I'll be able to berate the staff of my dealership in accents of the world! Good stuff. :)

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  14. It's almost noon there. Any luck?

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    1. It's looking like tonight........or tomorrow? *sigh*

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  15. Bleh, that's so annoying, Ken. You should definitely insist on getting a discount.

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    1. I'm seeing what it looks like when it finally shows up. Then maybe I can see how much they will allow me on things I'd like fixed up before it comes home.

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  16. Argh!!!! So frustrating! Hope you get it all worked out soon.

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    1. Thanks Stephani, I'm sure it will.

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  17. Very well told. It has to be frustrating. You would think they would at least know where it is.

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    1. You certainly would think so. Or they know it hasn't moved from where it originally was and would rather I didn't know that?

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  18. I can just see the mask of frustration and irritation on your face right now. I wish I had the magic words to make you feel better, but hopefully it will all work out in the end.


    Michael A. Walker
    Defying Procrastination

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    1. It is certainly frustrating. In the end though, me getting in a fit isn't going to do much but get me even more stressed.

      Thanks for your concern. :)

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  19. I think I would've soiled my pants while attempting to suppress my anger at that point. I hope all goes well, and maybe you can talk them down on the price due to all the trouble you've gone through.

    It's strange how something so incredibly large can be lost. I worked in a valve plant a while back, and I was sent into the warehouse to find a 4 ton valve that had gone missing. Needless to say, it wasn't very hard to find.

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    1. I think it might have been a case of not being able to see the forest for the trees?

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  20. That is just ridiculous! How does a dealership lose something that large?! So crazy. And it doesn't sound like your salesman know what hes doing. Hopefully Monday comes and your combine is where you need it to be. You know...not lost.

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    1. It finally showed up at closing time on Monday. I was able to give it a quick look over and make a list of things that I wasn't too keen on. Tuesday I went back in and we went over the list.

      They've been working on it since then. I'm hoping to get it Thursday. I would like to put it straight to work but I guess we'll see?

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