Monday, October 28, 2013

#174. or, The Wedge

  The best way that I can describe it, is that it's like a wedge.

  The beginning of harvest is the wide side of the wedge. That's where I start, looking side to side, and there's all this potential, and vast array of jobs to do. But there's time and while there's always pressure, it's not an overwhelming pressure that threatens to crush you into the ground as you try to get everything done. Because the wedge is wide, and it offers you the flexibility to move from side to side and spread out you're duties where you best see fit.

  Moving along, one breakdown compounds into the next and as the sides of the wedge begin to narrow, certain jobs have to be set aside, as it becomes obvious there's not going to be enough time to get everything on that list completed.

  And as you drive yourself into the point of that wedge, with all the force you can muster, as things seem to fall apart around you, the motion of trying to achieve that goal becomes the only thing you can focus on. It's the only thing that matters. The thing that you set out to accomplish even before there was the hint of a wedge, because in the beginning, it was so wide you didn't even notice it was there.

  However, the jobs you cast aside don't just disappear, they're still there needing to be done, they've just slipped behind you, and you drag them along. Toward that point, that goal, and all that stuff behind you is now pushing you into the tip of that wedge, forcing you into a place, that while it was your objective all along, it's a position that's uncomfortable and heavy as the days left available to you become less and less. Everything is compounded. Little breakdowns are the end of the world because they keep you from your goal. Inconsequential things make you angry for no reason. And at night, you crawl into bed exhausted and dusty because you're too tired to wander through the shower, yet you can only sleep sporadically as thoughts of all those jobs you cast to the wayside come back to haunt your slumber when you try to shut off your brain for a handful of hours.

   I don't know if what I do is the insanity, and writing is the anchor, or writing is the insanity and what I do is the anchor? But I think, having a little insanity in my life is a good thing. Whatever it is, writing is one of the things that got put on hold while I raced to that wedge. I'm not apologizing for it, but I've missed it. My notebook, that had gotten crammed into a deep deep corner of my dusty backpack is ready to come out again and get filled with ideas, because  on Thursday night, I finished my harvest. Beyond the date I had set out for myself. Hell, I blew far far beyond that date. But I did finish, and while there's still plenty of things to be done, at least it feels like I've come out the other side of that wedge.

   Perhaps that wedge isn't really a wedge at all, but more of an hourglass, and over the next month or so, as I move away from that narrow point, and all the potential of the wide open view sinks in, I'll have the desire to do it all over again.

 .............because after all, there's always next year.












36 comments:

  1. I'm constantly getting forced through the wedge....always putting things on the back-burner because the task is daunting.

    Let me tell you something, Ken....my fat ass can't fit through the wedge anymore! Too much grilling!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. DAN!

      Nice to see you around Dan.

      I'll forgive you for the grilling. Grilling and beer.

      Delete
  2. I'm still stuck in the 'getting ready for winter wedge.' But I guess mine is slightly different because if I don't get to the point then I guess I'll freeze to death or have to move to Florida or something.

    And nobody wants that.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Holly,

      Getting ready for winter is the worst! I'm running about trying to get everything done, that needs to be, before it freezes up solid.

      Maybe well both move to Florida and spend the days drinking.......in moderation, so as to not cause any of those whole day hangovers. :)

      Delete
  3. This was an awesome analogy of the life that is farming. I'm just glad for you, that it's done for this year. I know it's not all that long before you begin planning for the next, and who knows, maybe this will be the year you slide thru that narrow spot in the hourglass ahead of time and smiling all way! Your pondering on what role writing plays in your life is similar to mine, I just know that if I don't do it I reach the point of internal combustion, and that wouldn't be pretty at all!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. J2S!

      I set these goals that I try to achieve as I move through the different stages of farming throughout the year, and I pass them, but there's always a new one. They're not always easy to get done, and I don't expect them to be. This year just seemed harder to me than most.

      It wasn't all that long ago that there wasn't really any sort of structured writing in my life. Funny how times change. :)

      Delete
  4. That's an excellent description! It helps me to understand something better of which I have no personal experience

    Thank goodness the harvest is done! Well done farmer :) Now its time to start thinking about things like our 5k!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Kianwi!

      Our V5K is on my mind. I'm expecting to get back to some sort of exercise type activity pretty darned soon. I'm thinking we should kick it off some time in November, I'll shoot you an email. :)

      Delete
  5. Great analogy Ken. I feel like I have my wedge too and it's a constant battle to balance everything. Glad the harvest is done and you've got more time for writing. Excellent to see you back on the yeah write grid!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Linda,

      It didn't really occur to me while I was writing this, but it would be silly of me not to think that everybody has their own wedge to deal with. As long as we all make it through, I guess, is all that matters. :)

      Delete
  6. Congratulations on another successful harvest. It's great to see you back on the grid! Happy writing.

    Karen

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Karen,

      Glad to be back. They don't always work here, but when they do, and I have the time to interact with everyone, I'll be around. :)

      Delete
  7. only you can intrigue me with an analogy of a wedge. glad you're back to the business of writing, and that your harvest is done.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks so much.

      That's me. Putting an interesting spin on the mundane, since 2012. Or whenever I started this blog. You gotta stick with what you know? :)

      Delete
  8. I'm glad you came to the other side of that wedge. This was really good writing and quite insightful into a life and occupation far different from mine. Good stuff all around.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Life is getting through the wedge so that we can get to what we really want to do. Very nice symbolism here, Ken. I wish you a fruitful season of writing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Bill,

      Besides feeding cows, winter is my slowest time. I hope to take advantage of that.

      Delete
  10. That time off seems to purify the mind, readying it for a fresh start at writing. This seems almost cathartic. Glad you made it through the wedge--now go fill that notebook.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Kerry Ann,

      I'm hoping now I can come up with some fresh new ideas, I can only imagine people are getting tired of the topic after my last 3 harvest posts. Notebook and pencil are primed and ready! :)

      Delete
  11. What an interesting way of looking at it. Congrats on escaping the wedge/hourglass. And welcome back to the writing world. At least until that wedge opens up again, I guess.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks.

      Even though things are still pretty hectic around here, getting that job out of the way takes a ton of pressure off.

      Delete
  12. Thank God it's over for this year! It reminds me of finals time at school - no time for anything else.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Natalie,

      Yikes! School was ages ago for me, but I believe you might be right about that. :)

      Delete
  13. Ken, you certainly have a wonderful way with words. We just bought 53 acres of land. I know that isn't much, but we have only ever lived on 1 acre of land. I don't know what in hell we're going to do with all that. I'm sure I'll end up too tired to shower and end up lying in the bed all dusty. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey there, Susannah,

      Thanks so much.

      53 acres is certainly nothing to sneeze at. You're probably going to need a tractor, should I expect to see some posts from Susannah in-a-tractor sometime soon? :)

      Delete
  14. You nailed what "the wedge" feels like, no matter what out wedge happens to be. And I get you thing about writing and a little insanity in life s exactly what the doctor ordered. There's always next year, or next time, fr so many things in life. I guess until there's not. Great writing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Gina,

      "Next year, or next time". I think I'm probably going to have to squeeze through a few wedges before next fall, but for now, I'm still enjoying being out of the last one. :)

      Delete
  15. I love your analogy of a wedge and an hourglass. And whether writing is the insanity or the anchor, I hope you keep doing it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Dana,

      I can't see writing ever not being a part of my life any more. There will be times when it's more difficult to squeeze into my schedule, but I'm certain it will always be there. :)

      Delete
  16. Preparing for the holidays is definitely my wedge. Love the description of dragging the tasks along behind...so true!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The, "preparing for holidays" wedge! I believe I may have a post about that sometime soon. :) *plays foreshadowing music in the background*

      Delete
  17. That is the most glorious description of REAL LIFE I've read. At least in recent memory.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ya, my memories getting to be like that too. ;)

      Thanks so much.

      Delete
  18. I too am a real goal setter... this post makes such sense to me. Im glad you came back to writing .

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Zoe,

      Thanks!

      I'm always happy when you stop by. :)

      Delete