Friday, November 02, 2012

#125. or, let's dig up past traumatic experiences

My good friend Carrie, Over at Hammock in the Honeysuckle, is currently running this completely wonderful contest where she's giving away a trip.  YES! That's not a typo, she's giving away a freakin trip! Why, you may ask, would someone give away a trip when they are up to their eyeballs in stress and work (that's her) and could honestly use the time away themselves? Because quite possibly, she's the most awesome person, like....EVER! That's why!

  So how do you get in on this contest? Do you have to donate a kidney? Do you have to subject yourself to excruciating pain like the unfortunate zipping incident that I don't really want to talk about? No, all that's required is to answer a question. One answer is one entry. Each week there's a new question and each answer is a another time your name goes into the pot. Simple as that.

  This weeks question is:

 Have you had a funny or embarrassing moment happen where you thought to yourself, "If only someone caught that on camera, I'd win the $10 000 prize"? What is your cash prize-worthy moment?

 I have notoriously sleepy eyes. Also a bad haircut, but for this story, I only want to focus on the sleepy eyes.
Ever since I was a kid, I've been conscious of the fact that, more often than not, photos of me look like I've been on a 3 day bender. OK, not like since forever. When I was really little everything was fine.


 And even in about grade 4, things were still pretty good. In fact, I think that's also about the same time I peaked at my maximum cuteness. It's been all downhill from there.



  In grade 5, I knew that in photo's, my eye's were looking sleepy. I practiced in the mirror with various expressions so I didn't look like I was about to fall asleep. In fact, I still do that just in case I find myself in a photo op. I new what I had to do to give my best 1970's, Vinnie Bobberino look, in my polyester shirt. Except when it came time to put all my practice into play,  I blew right past Vinnie Bobberino, right into Marty Feldman.



 If you're in grade 5, that's a pretty tough picture to live down. When you're 44 years old, that's a pretty tough picture to live down. I had to dig it out of the back of the closet and blow the dust off it just to scan it. But of course now, it's all over the internet for the rest of my fricken life just in case somebody decides to google an image of me.

  For the last 35 years or so, at least there was a small piece of happiness inside of me knowing that there were 20 some other kids in that class who could dig out that picture on cold winter nights, huddled by the fire, keeping warm, laughing at the picture of the fool with the googly eyes. Maybe you can do that too.





16 comments:

  1. No offense, but I would be more concerned with your clothing choices in those pictures than your eyes!

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    1. It was the 70's. My mother dressed me in the height of fashion.

      But give it a couple years, the look's coming back.

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  2. I would have to second Kevin's comment! Although those eyes look like you just seen a ghost!

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    1. Nobody rocked big collars and polyester like I did!

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  3. Well, you certainly don't look sleepy in that one! Nope. Looks more like you saw a Sasquatch standing behind the photographer and you were just about to warn him but seeing as how Sasquatches are quick like meteors, he ripped the photographer's head clean off, snap the photo himself, stole all the mystery meat from the lunch ladies and wandered back into the wilderness leaving you and your very non-sleepy eyes the only child to have actually witnessed the tragedy.

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    1. I'm pretty perceptive that way. :)

      You know......it's pretty ironic that the mythical creature that nobody can catch on camera, except for a handful of grainy still shots, showed up to take our grade 5 class picture?

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  4. Oh Ken, you were a cutie patootie kid even with the googly Marty Feldman eyes, LOL! Ghosts? Sasquatch? No -- I think the kid behind you gave you a goose!

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    1. I had to go and dig the photo out of the back of the closet again just to see who was standing behind me.

      I'd never suspected, it's always the quiet ones handing out the gooses, (geese?) when you least expect it! :)

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  5. I can sympathize. I didn't have sleepy eyes but I did have a mouth that turned up sarcastically at the corners making me look like a sarcastic cat. I can't remember how many times I was told to wipe that smirk off my face---when I wasn't smirking.

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    1. It's a good thing we didn't hang out as kids. Me looking sleepy and bored to death and you looking sarcastic, we would have spent all of our time sitting in the corner!

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  6. Hahahaha! That gave me a great laugh :) But you were really adorable anyway!

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    1. But not quite puppy adorable? ;)

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  7. Oh Lord, how I remember those horrid school photos that looked more like mugshots. Yours really weren't that bad, I've seen far worse, but that last group photo was the smile maker for my day... thanks for finding the courage to post it up to share, I bet your kids love it! Just too funny! :-)

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    1. Oh Josie, I spared you the horror of my high school pictures! Mostly those are are where the bad hair stories are. Probably not posting those. I'm not quite ready for that much humiliation. :)

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  8. My friend,
    That last picture - it just made me grin. Someone stole my word up there in the comments about your kid pictures - cutie patootie. For sure! And I disagree - we all need to see the high school pics. We promise not to laugh...well....I better not promise that, but I could post some lovelies.

    This is a GREAT post and perfect for the embarrassing moment question - thanks for being a sport and sharing it! :) I think it is safe to say it has made us all like ya even more! :)

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  9. OH my god. This is the second time I've read this post and every time I get to that last picture...I can't help. I just start laughing. But holy crap you were SO adorable!!!

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