Thursday, March 08, 2012

#52. or, Princess Auto

  My wife is a very efficient shopper. She likes to go in, get what the hell she's after and then get the hell back out. I don't think she particularly likes shopping with me. I'm a bit of a distracted shopper, so when we go shopping for groceries, my job, aside from pushing the cart, is just to keep up. The only exception to this is clothes shopping. Clothes shopping requires more effort. Things have to go with other things and articles need to be tried on. Now, i'm actually quite fond of helping her shop for clothes. I'm more than happy to wander the isles with her while she looks for things that work. I try to lend support in helping her to make some of the decisions. I know though, that my job is to basically look after the cart while she's in trying things on. I know that shes not going to come out of the change room in an outfit and ask my opinion, so it's up to me to find a quiet place to park, while she's in there deciding if she likes what she's picked out. I think i'm pretty good at that too. I know it's better for me to wait in the jacket section than in, say...... the bra department. I think it's probably a little more comfortable for a woman to choose a bra when there isn't some middle aged guy loitering around at the end of the isle. I do however, quite often suggest she buy the leopard print underwear set. She hasn't yet, but i can be pretty persistent.

  If i was going to design a shopping complex, the store that i would choose to put beside a Wal-Mart, would be Princess Auto. It seems pretty logical to me. The husband could go one way and his wife, the other. The shopping would be done in half the time and they could get home early enough to have his wife model that leopard print number i mentioned earlier.

  Princess Auto is, for lack of a better description, two acres of awesomeness. I can't think of any other place that you can be pushing a cart along and hear: "OH LOOK! A WHOLE BIN FULL OF CHEVY POWER WINDOW MOTORS FOR 5 BUCKS A PIECE! SWEET!" At Princess Auto, you can get everything from a gas powered excavator you can pull behind your quad, (gas powered excavator......say that three times in a row.) to an empty military ammunition box. Truthfully, if i could think of a reason to own an empty military ammunition box, other than to say to my buddy, "hey, look at this! It's an actual empty military ammunition box!" i would probably already own one.

  Princess Auto is the store where it's my wife's job to push the cart while i wander around like a kid who's just eaten a whole bag of gummy bears asking questions like, "Do you think we could ever use up a thousand feet of camouflage colored rope? It's only 7 bucks!" I can imagine she'd probably rather stab her eyeballs out with a spoon.

   Yesterday, i had a bit of free time, so i went into the city to replace a few of the items we lost in the fire. We had gotten a Princess Auto flyer earlier in the week and i knew i could get a good deal on some stuff. I went by myself, so i had plenty of time to wander the isles. It was wonderful. Imagine my surprise to find these.

12 inch traffic cones. Because 24 inch would just be overkill

  I actually spent some time in the traffic cone department deciding on these. They make collapsible traffic cones. I know why they do that, it's for convenience. But if i'm going to shell $3.99 for a traffic cone, i want everyone to be able to see it, so those were out. I was afraid that if i bought the 24 inch cones, people might think that i'm compensating for something. Therefore, by process of elimination, i am now the proud owner of two, glorious, non-collapsible, 12 inch traffic cones.

  ...............i can't wait to come up with something to use them for.   


  1. I'm with ya Ken, Princess Auto RULES!!
    Time almost stands still when I get into the Surplus Section - my mind just kicks into Overdrive thinking of things I could do with all those goodies.
    Erwin Pederson

  2. Me too Erwin. If i ever had the time or ambition to put every grand plan that occured to walking those isles, i'd probably be out of time AND ambition! :)